Self-care is a way of taking care of ourselves physically, mentally, and/or emotionally. It involves actively engaging in practices that reduce stress and make us feel good. It comes in many forms and looks differently for everyone. It might involve going for a walk, playing a sport, reaching out to a friend, reading, writing, taking some alone time, eating something you love… there are so many possibilities! Self-care is about being compassionate to ourselves and our bodies, respecting and loving ourselves as we are, and listening to our needs and emotions. It is about taking the time to understand what makes us feel good, and then doing just that!
For more information about self-care, check out: What is Self-Care, Anyway?
Bodies
Our bodies are amazing, and come in all different shapes, colours and sizes. Understanding and respecting your body can help your relationship to your sexuality, your gender and your experiences and feelings around sex. It is important to understand the changes going on in your body, how to stay healthy and how to protect and respect your body during sex.
Body image is the way you view your own body and physical appearance. Having a positive body image means you are confident and comfortable. There are different challenges that affect our body image, such as pressure from our family, friends, society, and media. In North American society, we are constantly told that our bodies must be a certain way and that we are not good enough if our bodies do not look that way. This is especially true when our bodies are stigmatized for being LGBTQ+, racialized, gendered, or having different abilities. Finding ways to make yourself feel most comfortable and confident in your body is important, like through self-care, community-care, and on-going support.
Having a positive body image can also help you make safer decisions about the type of sex you are having or not having. Understanding, appreciating and respecting your body can help you to gain understanding of your sexuality and your feelings around sex. Our body image can also be strongly affected by gender norms. Learn more about gender, gender identity, gender expression and gender dysphoria.
For more information, check out:
How to Be More Present During Sex.
How to Love What You See in the Mirror.
Body Positivity
Self-esteem refers to your understanding of your own value and worth. Having self-esteem can be difficult when you are told that you are not good enough, especially if you're LGBTQ+. Through formal and informal structures in society, you may be told that you are not as valuable as other people. This is especially relevant for people who experience other systemic injustices such as racism, ableism, sexism, or classism.
Finding the best ways to make yourself feel most comfortable and confident is super important, such as through self-care, community-care and having on-going support. When translating into sex and sexual activity, having self-esteem can help you make decisions on what type of sex you’d like to have or not have, and what feels good to your body.
Community Care
Taking care of yourself doesn’t need to be just about you! Community care is important too, depending on where you live. Communities can look different for everyone, and can include people like your family, neighbours, school, an LGBTQ+ community, church, etc. Engaging in community care means that you’re looking out for one another, and giving and receiving support. Community care is important because it reminds us that we are loved, valued, and have people in our lives that we can count on and share similar experiences with.
There are many different forms of community care, for example, you might be part of a group on social media, or you might go to a neighbourhood community centre where there are programs specific to your identity. Engaging in community-care can give you the strength and support to face difficulties in your life. If you are having difficulty finding a community, you can always try different forms of self-care to make yourself feel good.